Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
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