i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
