I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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