Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
