I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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