this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize