To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
