ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
