idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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