my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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