can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
