I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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