I didn't shave. On purpose
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
