wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
