Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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