I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
