I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
