I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
