After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
