I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
