Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize