Midget sex pt 2 tonight
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
We have started to decorate penises.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
