I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
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