Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
a search helicopter?!
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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