White coat. Heels.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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