I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
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