i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
