hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
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