what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Please, let me fuck your mom
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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