I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
