hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
