Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize