Fine. I'll sleep in my office
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
