How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
