NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
