they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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