He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
