cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
