Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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