do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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