Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
