I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
this will be a night to untag.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
