Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
