Christians are straight up FREAKS
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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