I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
