I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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