the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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