If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize