why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
