you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
this must be what syphilis tastes like
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
