All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
