1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
